Ask Hookem and OCs
by Hookemhorns12
Summary: S.O.S.- We are bored, running low on food and soda, and restless! Ask a question, or send in a dare! JUST PLEASE HELP US! WE'RE BACK ON!
1. Chapter 1

_**IN A GAMEROOM SOMEWHERE IN TEXAS…**_

A yellow lab sat bored on his laptop, typing this very story. Said lab was tall, with sizeable (but not massive) muscles. He wore nothing but jeans and a Dallas Cowboys jersey. The sounds of struggle became audible, and he turned his head to the source of the noise. He sighed and watched as his OCs fought over who got to play XBOX next.

"Knock it off you two." He barked at Wyatt and Anti-Wyatt, who had put each other in a head lock.

"BUT HOOKEM!" Wyatt whined.

"NO! I AM SO FUCKING SICK OF YOU TWO FIGHTING! MAN UP AND DEAL WITH IT!" he growled. Wyatt and Anti-Wyatt sighed and let go of each other. Hookem sat back up, and faced the reader.

"Are you starting a new story? WHO'S IN IT?" Wyatt called hopefully. He quite enjoyed being Hookem's flagship character, and was always wondering what adventure Hookem would place him in next. Hookem nodded.

"Anyways, if you haven't guessed by now, I am Hookemhorns12." He said to the reader. He gestured over to the two cats beside him. "And these two are Wyatt and Anti- Wyatt, my current Sonic the Hedgehog characters."

"What about us?" an orange cat with a white jacket and black pants called.

"Oh yes, and these are my OCs that I have in my head, but have yet to write a story about. The one in whit is Vanquish, and his twin is Tyranny." Hookem said.

"At your service." Tyranny said with a cocky smirk. He was wearing a black jacket.

"And Shi Xin. He's my Kung Fu Panda OC." Hookem said, pointing to a sleeping leetah (lion/cheetah) with heavily torn olive pants. The last person in the room was also the only human.

"Captain Blake O'Brien, at your service." The man said in a heavy Celtic accent. He was tan, with a standard military buzz cut and green eyes. He wore a standard flight suit.

"He's my Star Fox character. He already has his own story." Hookem said. "So, Blake, care to tell the reader about our situation?" Blake stood in front of the camera, facing the reader.

"We are low on tortilla chips, salsa, and Dr. Pepper. We are getting bored of playing XBOX, and Hookem currently has writers block for all of his stories. We need emergency re-supply." Blake explained.

"So go ahead, ask a question, any question!" Wyatt said enthusiastically, stepping in front of Blake. Anti-Wyatt ran up and pushed him out of the way.

"And make sure to leave it in a review!" the cyan furred cat added before he was tackled by his other.

"You heard them. We're bored as _hell_ and we're running out of tortilla chips." Hookem said as both Wyatts rolled around in the background. "And feel free to even send us a dare or two!"


	2. Chapter 2

Hookem checked his laptop for reviews.

"Hey guys, we actually got a few." He called. "Even a dare, if I'm reading this correctly."

Wyatt, Anti, Blake, Vanquish, Tyranny, and Shi all dropped what they were doing and ran behind the lab. All eyes were scanning the page.

"HA! TheGuyintheBackground called you a girl!" Wyatt laughed. Hookem growled.

"Humph. Cheeky bastard…" he grumbled. "Alright, first question is to me, from The5thBeatle5."

_**When can we expect Beating Sonic Heroes 2?**_

"Well…" Hookem wondered. Wyatt stepped in.

"Whenever this asshole can wrap up that lame ass drabble series." Wyatt said, jutting a thumb to Hookem. Hookem growled.

"Hey, do you want to get laid or not? I still haven't written that chapter." Hookem snarled. Wyatt was quiet after that. Hookem rolled his eyes and looked back to the laptop.

"This one's for us…" Vanquish muttered. Tyranny stepped in.

"Hey, more guns! Thanks, MoonLitWarrior159!" Tyranny exclaimed and took the guns. He carried them over to the closet and walked in.

"Put them next to the WMD!" Vanquish called.

"Got it!" Tyranny called back. A minute later he stepped out, brushing the dust off himself.

"Next." Hookem said. "It's from MoonLitWarrior159 again!"

_**Torture Wyatt!**_

"Oh hell yeah! That can be arranged!" Anti-Wyatt cackled evilly. Just then, Blaze walked in.

"Take this. It'll make Wyatt useless so he can't attack back!" she giggled maniacally and tossed them a bottle. Wyatt sweat dropped and began to back up. Everyone in the room turned and grinned, cracking their knuckles menacingly.

"Come on guys! This really isn't necessary!" Wyatt said, holding up his hands in defense. Hookem pulled out a length of rope.

"GET 'EM!" Hookem commanded…

… Five minutes later, Wyatt was tied to a chair. He was in a room with surround sound and a large flat screen TV.

"Hey, this isn't so bad!" Wyatt said. The TV flicked on, showing a non-stop marathon of Oprah Winfrey. "NOOOOOOOOO!"

Hookem chuckled and slammed the door, locking him in. "That takes care of that!"

"Hey, the next one's for all of us! From PyroManiac97!" Blake called.

_**Do you like Pink Floyd?**_

"Hell no." Tyranny said, crossing his arms.

"Meh, sometimes." Anti said.

"Only when I'm high." Hookem said. Everyone looked at him with a shocked expression, and then slowly turned back to the computer screen.

"Definitely, ROCK ON!" Shi said, putting up his devil horns.

"Same as Anti." Blake said.

"Yes, on occasion." Vanquish muttered from his shadowy corner.

_**Anti- How're things with Nicole?**_

"Well Pyro, I- hold on…" Anti-Wyatt muttered and answered his phone. "Hello?"

"You have about two minutes to get over here and get in this bed, or you're in big trouble!" Nicole said from the other end.

"Kay, see you soon." Anti said before hanging up. "Well, does that answer your question?" he asked before stepping out the door.

"AND NO THANKS TO THE BASS PLAYER OFFER!" he called from outside.

"Well then…" Hookem muttered. "The next one's from Pyro again, for Wyatt."

_**Wyatt- Would you like to join our band? We need a drummer.**_

"IF IT GETS ME OUT OF HERE, SURE!" Wyatt called form inside the room.

_**What band from the 80s that no one has heard of is your favorite?**_

"_**Accept**_, definitely. My favorite song from them is 'Balls to the wall'." Wyatt called again.

"Okay… Next is for me." Hookem said and cleared his throat.

**Will you ever write a lemon starring Wyatt?**

"Yeah Hookem, will you?" Wyatt called hopefully.

"Wyatt, you're still going to get laid. The only difference is whether the world gets a front row view or not." Hookem sighed irritably. "To answer your question Pyro,_ maybe_. It just kind of depends, you know? It would be my first lemon, after all…"

"Alright, next is from Satheroth335." Blake called.

_**Wyatt- Have you ever played the Kingdom Hearts games?**_

"Sorry, I haven't!" Wyatt called.

_**How would you fare against the nemesis from Resident Evil 3?**_

"Let's find out…" Hookem chuckled evilly. He opened the door, and Wyatt zoomed out. "He's outside right now."

"ALRIGHT! LET'S GO YOU MOTHER FUCKER!" Wyatt yelled and charged outside. There was a surprised meow, a crash, and a roar, and then Wyatt came flying back into the house. He slammed into the wall and slumped to the floor.

"Obviously, he didn't fare too well!" Hookem observed.

_**How do you feel against going through the Resident Evil games?**_

Wyatt ears perked up. "Wait, WHAT?"

"Let's find out!" Vanquish snickered and tossed Wyatt through a portal to the RE universe.

"YOU SON OF A BIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIITCH!" Wyatt shouted angrily as he fell. The portal re-sealed itself, leaving them alone.

"Well, he's probably going to be gone for the rest of the chapter…" Hookem muttered off handedly.

"…" everyone remained quiet.

"WOOHOO!" at least, for a few seconds.

"Alright, next batch is from TheGuyintheBackground." Hookem said. "First one's for me."

_**How did you find fan fiction? And what was the first category you wrote about?**_

Hookem thought it over.

"Well, to tell the truth, I never knew about fan fiction until I did a Google search for _Halo 4_. There was a link to a fan written story titled _Halo 4_, so I clicked it. I read a few chapters, and then decided that this was the coolest shit ever. So I scrolled around the site a little and stumbled upon the Star Fox section. That's where I decided to begin. I actually had three stories before Beating Sonic Heroes that I deleted, because they sucked like hell."

_**Any ideas for Beating Sonic Heroes 2?**_

"Well, I won't give it all away. But I will say this: In BSH, I wrote that the apocalypse in 2012 was actually when the Xorda dropped the gene bombs on earth, turning animals anthropomorphic. It WILL have something to do with that, but I will not say." Hookem said.

"Next is me I suppose…" Blake sighed and stood up.

_**How does your jet handle in the atmosphere with the swept forward wings?**_

"Honestly, it sucks arse. The designers overlooked atmospheric handling when they designed it. To be fair, it was designed to fly in the vacuum. The swept forward wings were added to reduce drag, therefore reducing stress on the wings during reentry. There have been several accounts of the wings being torn off the craft on the older rear swept models, resulting in a very painful and terrifying death." Blake said and took another breath.

"That's why we always try to stay in the black when we can. And if you're wondering why we didn't crash and burn during the opening dog fight in _A Shocking Discovery_, ask Hookem."

"Well, it wouldn't look very cool if you guys got picked off simply because of a design flaw! It's the same principal as action movies. Why do the characters' guns have unlimited ammo? It wouldn't look cool to have to reload every thirty shots!" Hookem defended. Blake only rolled his eyes.

"Well, that's all folks! TheDecivingShadows, I'm sorry, but we're going to have to wait until Wyatt and Anti get back to do your questions. See ya next chapter!" Vanquish said. They all waved to the reader as the camera backed out of the door…


	3. Welcome back!

**AN**: **Holy shit, it's been a while! I hope people are still interested in these things!**

Wyatt dragged himself back into the house. He had an assortment of new injuries, and looked like he had gone to hell and back. Anti-Wyatt followed him in, back from his night with Nicole.

"There you two are! We have a cubic butt load of questions and dares ahead of us!" Hookem barked. The two cats groaned and slumped on the couch.

"Fine." They grumbled.

"That's the spirit!" Hookem said sarcastically. "Alright, first up…"

_**TheDecivingShadows- I dare Blake to fly a plane into a cliff and jump out at the last second.**_

Blake shrugged. "Sure, why not?"

So five minutes later, Blake was soaring through the air in his jet. He aimed at the cliff and gunned the engine to full speed. At thirty feet and closing, he pulled the eject lever. He shot out of the jet and deployed the parachute, beginning a slow glide to the ground below…

… Hookem and the crew all watched with disinterested expressions.

"Wow that was a lame dare…" Wyatt scoffed. Hookem nodded in agreement before going rigid.

"Maybe it isn't so lame…" he grinned and ran off. He came back with an armful of paintball guns.

"Now you're talking." Vanquish muttered with a smirk, cocking the gun.

"Lock and load boys… Aaaaand, FIRE!" Hookem commanded. Everyone began to unload their weapons on Blake, who could do nothing but take the hits as he came down.

"AW FUCK! BLOODY HELL! YOU BASTARDS, I'M GONNA KILL YOU WHEN I GET DOWN THERE!" Blake shouted angrily.

"Run! It's angry groundskeeper Willie!" Wyatt laughed as they ran…

… Everyone filed back into the house, laughing like crazy.

"Alright… What's next?" Hookem barely panted out, wiping a tear from his eye.

_**TheDecivingShadows- Halo VS COD battle!**_

Hookem starred wide eyed at the screen before exploding.

"Aw… DAMN, THAT'S AWESOME! THAT'S REALLY FUCKING AWESOME!" he shouted, slamming his fist down on the arm rest.

"What?" Tyranny asked

"THIS GUY WANTS US TO PIT PRICE, SOAP, AND YURI AGAINST THE MASTER CHIEF!" Hookem shouted again.

"Why are you so angry about that?"

"I'M NOT! IT'S JUST REALLY, REALLY FUCKING AWESOME! GET SUITED UP, BECAUSE WE'RE DOING THIS!" Hookem barked, standing up and heading out the door.

Tyranny looked at the rest of them. "I told you showing him Metalocalypse was a bad idea." He said before following his author…

…Hookem stood on the hill overlooking the small battlefield. On one side was Task Force 141, and on the other was just the Master Chief.

"Alright, I want a good, clean fight to the death! GO!" Hookem called. Both sides charged forward, guns blazing. Yuri was picked off before he could make it to cover. Price and Soap both moved in. Soap shot at the armored human from one side while Price flanked from behind. Price set up a sentry gun behind the Chief. It opened fire, killing him instantly.

"COD wins! Suck it, GAYLO!" Wyatt shouted…

… The group came back into the house.

"Next up!" Hookem called.

_**TheDecivingShadows- (open dare) one of you jump off a twenty story cliff and into a pool of piranhas.**_

"SHI, YOU'RE UP!" Hookem called. The leetah's ears perked.

"Say WHAT?"

"You heard me. You haven't done _shit_ this whole story. Get your spotted ass off a cliff and into the water." Hookem barked.

"Make me."

"…" Hookem stayed quite, before reaching for a shotgun.

"ALRIGHT, I'M GOING!" Shi said and bolted out the door…

…Hookem and the gang sat in a boat in the middle of the lake, all starring up at Shi. Shi was on the edge of a very tall cliff, looking timidly at the liquid below. Wyatt began to chuckle.

"Here fishy fishy fishy!" He laughed and poured fish food into the water. It began to teem with life, and piranhas began to leap out of the water. Hookem brought up a megaphone.

"GO!" Hookem called. Shi took a deep breath and jumped. He cursed in Chinese all the way down. Everyone turned away and heard biting sounds, splashing, and yelps of pain. A minute later, Shi climbed into the boat.

"Never make me do that again…" he said, yanking a piranha off his tail and tossing it back in.

_**TheDecivingShadows- Hookem, do you describe yourself in your OCs, or do you make them up from scratch?**_

"Wyatt and Anti-Wyatt are the only OCs that possesses any likeness to me. I thought Blake up by watching Top Gun, and Vanquish and Tyranny are a hybrid of COD, Jason Bourne, and Splinter Cell." Hookem said.

He heard the door open, and turned around to see an auburn furred hedgehog with lavender highlights stride in. She wore a dark purple dress, much like Amy Rose's, and had similar quills. Her eyes were greyish-yellow, and angular in shape. On her feet were two stiletto heels, and above were many accessories.

"Oh yes, this is MoonLitWarrior159's OC, Lilia the Hedgehog!" Hookem called. Lilia waved, and an invisible audience applauded off camera.

"Thanks for letting me join, Hookem." Lilia said with a smile.

"Glad to have you here. Now you ARE aware that-"

"That in the proceeds of Hook TV, I may suffer severe bodily injury, dismemberment, illness, or emotional turmoil, and that you or the producers are in no way responsible for any harm that may come upon me during the show. Yeah yeah, I got it." Lilia said with a wave of her hand. "Now, what's going on today?"

"We have a few dares, and A LOT of questions." Hookem replied, turning back to his laptop.

_**TheDecievingShadows- Have Wyatt kiss Nicole and Anti-Wyatt kiss Blaze!**_

Nicole shrugged and pulled Wyatt over. She grabbed his by the shoulders and kissed him full on the lips. Blaze did the same with Anti. They let go finally after thirty seconds. Wyatt and Anti glared at each other.

"YOU SON OF A BITCH! YOU KISSED HER!" they shouted at the same time. They dove for each other and began rolling around on the floor.

_**TheDecievingShadows-Wyatt, do you find Blaze's castle rules fair?**_

"No, but he has no choice." Blaze answered for him.

_**Macabre Kaiser- Wyatt, what helped you get over the traumatic experience of you first murder? Would you do it again?**_

".HELL… But at least I had Blaze here by my side." Wyatt said, putting his arm around her waist and holding her close.

"And would you do it again?" Blaze purred.

"Always." Wyatt replied. Blaze kissed him and dragged him out of the house, heading to their bedroom. Wyatt grinned back at the reader and gave them thumbs up.

_**Macabre Kaiser- Wyatt, Anti, Vanquish, and Tyranny, go kick Nazi Zombie ass with this song playing**_

_**(**_.com/audio/listen/399830)

Vanquish gazed at the link with curiosity.

"Fuck it, it sounds fun!" he finally decided. "But wait, we're short a man."

"I'll do it!" Lilia said.

"You sure?"

"Hell yeah."

"Fine." Vanquish said. He, Lilia, Tyranny, and Anti all filed out the door. Hookem, Shi, and Blake all sat alone.

**AN: Alright, I know I probably didn't answer everyone's question, but I'm just putting this up for now.**

**PS- From now on, only ONE (1) question or dare per review. Trust me, I was over loaded this time around.**


End file.
